Simple Steps

Sometimes the world can be an overwhelming place to function in. It can feel as if everything is caving in on itself, only leaving you a small amount of room to breathe and feel alive.

When experiencing severe bouts of anxiety, one can be confined to such small places, not just physically but also mentally. In my previous post I touched upon Agoraphobia being a symptom of anxiety, limiting you to the outside world. However, it’s not just Agoraphobia, social anxiety, PTSD or many other conditions that can make your world seem small. The list is endless and incredibly personable. One circumstance could be dealt with in endless ways by every single different person.

If you are someone that feels as if they don’t deal with certain situations as well as others, don’t feel discouraged. You will often find that not everyone in the world is as resilient as they present and there are millions if not billions out there that feel the same way you feel at times. Humans are a community of collective emotions, and it’s the simple steps that matter before we make the huge leaps.

Simple steps could amount to a day of planning or even years of looking after yourself. But nonetheless, they are simple, achievable and possible. 

Before reading on any further, these steps aren’t bible, nor are they medically certified, they are for self-care. If you feel like you are not coping beyond simple steps, please take first line action in contacting your GP, mental health hotline services (linked in my blog home page) or 999 if you find yourself presented with a medical emergency. Help is always there when needed.

Step 1:

Get yourself out of bed. If you find yourself in a spell of anxiety and simply can’t get out of bed, give it a go. It’s very easy for us to decide to stay comfy and tucked away from everything, but often staying in bed prolongs the bad thoughts, as you aren’t exposing yourself to other stimulants from human interaction or just a different wall colour! If getting out of bed and completing the day’s tasks is too much for you, perhaps opt for another place where you can feel comfortable just so you can get a change of scenery. And if that isn’t possible and your room is the only place you can be, then make the bed, open the blinds and sit upwards with your head facing more towards the ceiling (it makes you feel more positive when you do so). Getting out of bed is something simple (for some), if you can do it, praise yourself and if you feel like its too much then give yourself praise for even wanting to.

Step 2: 

Try journaling. Writing down your feelings is such an amazing way to express emotions and keep track of the good, the bad and the ugly. Putting pen to paper once a day is a great way to become somewhat in charge of your emotions, learning how they develop over time and when they are felt the most. As time goes on, reading back on your journal almost becomes like a school book with information all over the pages. You learn about yourself from yourself! Once you’ve learnt about yourself, it’s a great starting point to begin to perhaps open up to someone or give a timeline of when a blip of anxiety has started or finished. A great way to journal is by writing down your task/ achievements for the day in the morning when you first wake up. Set the journal aside for the day and when its time for bed you tick off what you did or cross off what you didn’t and then just write about your day. Once you have written about your day give yourself a score out of 10 how you are feeling. Over time you will hopefully begin to see the numbers change for the better.

Step 3:

Sharing your thoughts with someone. A good old saying is that a problem shared is a problem halved. I truly believe in this saying when it comes to issues that are plaguing your mind. Find someone you trust to share your experiences or to delve into the past. Whether it be a family member, friend or even a support service, the feeling of sharing takes the weight of the problem off your shoulders (even if it is just a little bit). Humans aren’t meant to exist alone and be solitary. Community is built upon shared and learnt experiences. If you feel reluctant to share, don’t feel the need to spill all the beans, but at least say the headline issues. Don’t fear rejection from someone you trust! There are so many support services out there if you can’t talk to someone close to you such as the Samaritans. 24/7 they will be there to answer your calls or your texts.

Step 4:

Get something in your stomach. When feeling anxious, eating can be the last thing on your mind due to the physiological symptoms that come with anxiety. Your stomach may feel in knots, you may feel feverish and weak but not eating will only make these feelings worse at points. Try something simple if you feel like you can’t eat. BRAT diet is something that is easy on your stomach when feeling anxious as a first line of defense. Bananas, rice, applesauce and toast. On the other hand if you are having issues with eating, eat whatever you want just to get that one thing in your stomach.

Step 5:

Get some air. When we feel anxious we love to stay indoors and limit ourselves to the outside world as our sense of fear is heightened. If you can’t make it to the party, or the museum or the office, try and just open the front door and step outside or go into a garden if there is one. Breathing in the fresh air is extremely beneficial for us, often lessening feelings of anxiety. Even try to find some nature around you, whether that be a short or long walk to a nearby park, forest or field. If you feel as if you can’t go alone, bring someone you trust alongside you. Chances are they will enjoy the walk too! This will break up the day and give yourself something to reflect back on.

Step 6:

Gratitude. Practicing gratitude is scientifically proven to increase feelings of self esteem, increasing your internal locus of control. A great way to practice gratitude is to carry a small notebook on you at all times or leave it by your bedside table or use your notes app on your phone. Firstly, list all the things you are truly grateful for in your life no matter how big or small they may be. You could say “I’m grateful for my family” to “I’m grateful for the colour purple”. The list is endless and is extremely personable. From there on, begin to write down all the positive things that happen to you throughout your days. Try to keep them as small as possible, such as, the sky was blue today, or that falafel wrap I ate for lunch was yummy as hell. Once you do this for 2 weeks everyday, you will notice that your feelings of self esteem will go up! This is because they are all small wins that you have noticed yourself, you will begin to see the smaller details in life which actually mean more than the bigger picture. Accumulating these will give you evidence that there is positivity out there even on the worst of days. Once you have accumulated a few, instead of scrolling through TikTok or watching TV in bed or on your way back from work, read through your positives. They will make you feel a great sense of gratitude, hopefully putting a smile upon your face.

Step 7:

Plan something for yourself in the future. The thing we all need is hope. Hope that things will be better. We need to install a sense of purpose for ourselves. This can be hard to do when you feel as if you are in a blip of anxiety. It can be hard to imagine a life where you dont feel this way everyday, but certainly you wont! Planning something exciting for the future can give you hope that things will be fun and exciting again. It’s a goal to work towards. Again, these plans can be as big or as small as you need them to be. Try not to put a time stamp on these plans as you don’t want to put pressure on yourself that you must do these things, just do them when the time feels right! An example could be “I’m going to go for a picnic with my friends when the sun is shining”, or “I am going to take myself on a holiday”, or “I’m going to dye my hair blue”. Keep these future plans full of positivity. They will come true.